such a day huh.
i did it again even i promised to myself that i would never ever return to my past. such a fragile heart huh. woman.
regret? even if i say i'm regretting it, what would i get? honestly, 45% of regret, 55% 'un-regret'. broken english, again. regret because i was letting my ego and my iman down, 'un-regret' because i did try. yep, i knew i shouldn't have done that thing but i was unable to control myself and ended up i turned myself in.
and he said i throw him like rubbish..?
how could he be so much emotional like that even though he's the trigger for all of this hectic situation? i knew i was pretty mean towards him before but didn't he know that i am ME? that's the way i have been living all this time, that's the way he's been living with me for four years (plus plus). just because he's having someone else by his side right now, he started to judging me?
i still can't believe he's leaving me for another girl.huh. in fact, for the type of girl that i hate the most on earth. i hate myself for being such a hater.
i will live my life well too. with Allah's bless, insyaAllah i will find someone better. i can do it! why should i let myself stuck in depression while he's not? why should i suffer while he's not? why should i waste my study time right now just to think about something which cannot be solved anymore? why why and why?
because i'm a woman. and i'm emotional. and i'm hot-tempered.
yes, the hot-tempered me will never ever do the thing i did today, and yesterday. i promise. and i will never let go that promise (eceh, titanic sket)